| im back |
[Apr. 4th, 2006|03:07 pm] |
ok i just read all my old entries and it depresses me, i wish i was 117 again.
i did soo good before jamaica but once i got there, i ate like a cow. i knew it too, i felt fat and like i was gaining weight. my brother gained weight too--mainly b/c i went w/ my grandparents who MADE US EAT EVERYTHING. i'd say i wasnt hungry (even when i was on the verge of exploding from food) and they would make me eat. It was bad, i gained buttloads of weight
once i got home, i was scared to weigh myself..but that lasted not even 2 secs cause right when i got home, i rushed on the scale to find that im a 130 lbs. thats the highest ive EVER been in my life--i hate the sound of it--my normal usual weight is 120, and i would do anything to just get back there.
thats why today i only had around 500 calories. i know ill lose the weight, im confident--its just i know once i get back down to 120, i won't stop...and i'll never be happy
i just wish this would take faster--i go to florida in less than 2 weeks |
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